“Sometimes You Gotta Let Go”

Posted on February 26, 2013 by dontdestroyrelationship

There is a powerful song by Rahsaan Patterson, called, “Sometimes You Gotta Let Go.” (“I was a fool before, I walked away. Far from a loving that, caused me pain, caused me pain…”)

Sometimes, let go, we must.

We hold on to you. Go the extra mile for you. Some of us just do, because of who we are.

When there is an argument we try to remove the anger, and work the problem from a different angle. Putting the problem, not on any one in particular, while creating an angle of a team blame effort, rather than putting the blame on you. We propose a solution on how to avoid this in the future.

We say the words you are too proud to say, “I love you.”

We keep giving, not expecting to receive. In the back of our minds, we think some reciprocation of our efforts would provide us with some sort of encouragement. No matter what, we do not hold back. We bend over backwards; while defending you within ourselves, hoping you will come around and be the person you need to be, in order to help save this relationship.

When your temperament is fragile, we stay calm just to keep the peace.

We read self help books for improvement. We objectively evaluate our actions. We do everything in our power to avoid ending the relationship. We allow your distant behavior, without defense, so that we can fight for the relationship another day.

All you do is you, and what you want to do. It does not really matter what we do; or how hard we try, nor how many tears we shed, and the pain we feel.

It was inevitable. Another argumental fight ensues. This is it.
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“Sometimes, (you) gotta let go.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVbqTcRtbRU

I have gone above and beyond for you. I have gone the distance in believing in you. I have taken the blame, apologized when it was not my fault, to show a better way, of how a relationship could be. I tried not holding you liable for not doing your part. You want someone to do all the work you will not do, and you do not dare to try.

You resort to the one thing you have left to use. The blame game. Rather than looking at you, I am your scape goat. You blame me for the arguments. You refuse to see, how I put myself on the cross in an attempt to save us.

You cannot walk away with your conscience pervading you with guilt, bringing to you what you should have done and didn’t; and what you could have done, but wouldn’t. You cannot bear knowing it was your fault. Yet, not everything was your fault, but you defaulted on not even trying, because you were being too self righteous, too proud, self centered and stubborn.

You are walking away with a story full of illusion, listing my supposed wrong doings, rather than facing your nothingness. It will not happen right now, and maybe not in the near future; but you just may grow up, become a little wiser, and then, you will come to know.

You will think about me and begin to see. You will admit that what I was to you was true, real and in your best interest. You will see I loved you, in spite of you. You will then realize you were too full of yourself to see.

Instead, you forced me to make the tough decision of letting you go.

Should you not reflect on these things, oh well! My best was simply not enough for you. Where this would normally challenge my feelings in concluding this matter, with the fact that I came up short, despite my best efforts— in your case I will make an exception. Everything is not for everybody and this includes me. My everything is not for everybody. Either way, I had to let you go. My decision was made in peace and with a clear conscience.

I want to love the one who sees me for me. I am walking away from you knowing he/she is out there somewhere. Letting you go might expedite a knocking at my heart.

I had to let you go, in order for me to be better and to be the person I am designed to be. Not only for me, but also for the one, who will not only totally get (understand) me, but love me for me. I will be more than enough.

“Sometimes you gotta let go.”

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Talking Contradiction

Posted on February 25, 2013 by dontdestroyrelationship

Talking Contradiction

Your word is your bond. Your word is you. If you do not keep your word, how can I trust you.

How can I respect you when you do not keep your word? You should do what you say you will do. Can’t do it? Don’t say it! Otherwise, you leave me no choice but to see you less than what you are and even less in whom you say you are.

You like to talk, thinking you are communicating, when in truth you are “word hyperventilating.”

Your word has no power, and no backing; it is nothing but air. You can’t even play truth, nor can you even take the dare. You’re blowing smoke in saying what you will— but even your will is at a standstill. It has been so long since you have been “that real.” This makes you a talking contradiction.

You talk out of your face, saying things to try to make me feel a certain way. But all I see is a fake play by play. If I strike you with the power of truth, you can’t handle it; you will just back away; because you are a talking contradiction.

See you talk so much folk think you are rich, but you are really broke. When money is given to you on loan, your words cause you to choke. Despite what you say, you simply do not pay. When it comes to financially handling, you come up short. When it’s time to pay back, you just don’t.

You talk like you have the power, but when in the presence of real power, you actually cower. You say what you want to do, but lack the chutzpah to actually do. You talk about a system, something you cannot control— so all you do is patrol, appearing to be in control, but when the chips are down, you are at a loss for the words and the action; because you are powerless to counteraction.

You think you know what you know, when all you know is what you were told. When it comes to living what you are told, and being ’bout it, ‘bout it, — even you doubt it.

You tell others what they should not say, and you demand respect. But when you get out of line, and are told the same, you punk up and just walk away. Even your indignant pride is not enough to make you stay; because you are a talking contradiction.

See, all you’ve got are a bunch of words, because when I peep your game, your deeds, and your work— your verbal responsibilities you shirk.

Now every time you speak, I see you, just as you are— weak. And you have the audacity to think you know me in some illusionary capacity? You are saying things, trying to infuriate me. Thinking I am powerless against the words you say, when in truth I am only letting you have your way. Should I try to reason with you? Nah! You don’t even get the time of day. So, I just let you have your say.

Words are not where the power lies. The actions, the solutions, the knowhow, the skill, are where we really thrive. The words we speak are only to supplement and complement what we really are and claim to be. But words without action are like “faith without works.”

Rather than choosing to talk it out, try to work it out. Keep your word, and fulfill it no matter what. Take a stand; be a woman! Be a man! You and your word are one. Let it be spoken, let it be done!

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